About Me

This blog is about real life, because I couldn’t make this sh$t up if I tried.

What I Write About

This blog is about real life, because I couldn’t make this sh$t up if I tried.

My posts are mostly satirical accounts of my every day experiences as a mom, wife, friend and worker bee – with the occasional heartwarming story thrown in.

I try not to take life too seriously, because most of the time, all you can do is laugh.

Disclaimer: If you are offended by the occasional bad word or references to lady parts, this blog probably isn’t for you. Alternatively, if you are specifically looking for lady-parts, this blog probably isn’t for you.

Who I Am

I’ve been married to my high school sweetheart for 10 years, which means according to statistics, we probably won’t last much longer (subscribe now, before it’s over!)

I have a 6-year old son and a baby girl on the way, so I’m basically a parenting expert.

I work in marketing for a well-respected, highly professional organization, that would likely prefer to not be associated with this blog in any way.

Some of my favorite things include: $4 bottles of Barefoot Cabernet, flamingos, Frank Sinatra and the color turquoise.

Some of my least favorite things include (but are not limited to): fake sugar, nursing homes, fussy babies in restaurants, and mouth breathing.

Why Follow Me?

Can we just get straight to being friends? We have so much in common.

We’re all just trying to control our temper, our stomach flab and our spending in Target. Am I right?

I have no free printables or coupons with which to bribe you. If you want to subscribe anyway, I’d be stoked!

Time Spent Picking Up Legos
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