Dear Mom Who Brought Your 2-Year-Old to the Nail Salon,
You owe me $40.
I saved up for two weeks to get the “deluxe” pedicure.
You know…the one with the hot stones, and wax, and oil and NO FUSSY TODDLERS?
I was just settling in to my US Weekly when you walked in – 20 minutes before closing time.
Requesting a pedicure for you….and your toddler.
I’ve always had an aversion to hair.
At age 9, I discovered a mound of grey curly hair sitting atop the eggs and bacon of my breakfast sandwich at Waffle House. Since then, I’ve had a full-fledged phobia of hair, and Waffle Houses.
It’s probably why I wear my hair in a pony-tail most days, despite the fact that I spend countless hours highlighting, conditioning, straightening and coiffing it to look like one of Kim Zolciak’s wigs.